She showed me how to love....

"... Break my heart for what breaks yours.
Show me how to love how you have loved me.."

Over the past few years, I have prayed that prayer and God has overwhelmed me. Broken my heart for what breaks His. And it continued to happen this summer but more than that, God really showed me how to love and be loved.

I cannot explain the love that I have for some of the girls in Cambodia of which I do not even verbally even speak the same language to. How they quickly can take pieces of my heart. How they can show me more of God's heart to love regardless. I was at a point this summer where I felt like I had nothing left in me to give. Was burnt-out. But it did not matter. Because it was not about my doing but just being. Letting God be God. The ministry of presence can be so much deeper than doing so many tasks and good works. I was ministered to by the support of family and friends and constantly by my team this summer. When as a team, we let go of our own ideas and doing- we got to relax and enjoy what God was doing around us. Rather than being frustrated by constant changes of plans.

One of the girls in particular really showed me how to love. I really saw myself in her, in her trying to be strong and not knowing how loved she is. I simply just loved being with her. I wanted to show her love, but I ended up being taught that in deeper ways than I would ever be able to conjure up. I want her to have a good life but she is also the one that is worried if I am doing okay. She reminded me of God's goodness. God taught me through her and my team that He simply likes to give good gifts to His children. That He makes all things new and beautiful.

One example is through jewelry she made that my team gave to me. Or by being back in North Carolina right now trusting that God knows the desires of my heart. I was shown love so much this summer and really grateful to have had two months with such wonderful, beautiful people that God loves so much. I just pray that they and us can continue or begin to know that love.